Lessons To Self

This document should be amended as you age.

  1. Work to implement your values in all you do. Act towards the things you value—agency, generosity, empathy, kindness, energy, efficacy, acceptance, sustainability, interestingness, etc.

  2. Do what you say you will. The best way to start working in this direction is being very, very careful about what you say “yes” to. Be liberal and gentle with saying “no”.

  3. Touch it once. Do not split tasks into multiple parts unnecessarily. Do not defer. “Do easy” and keep the task contained within itself as best you can. Close the gap between idea and action.

  4. Seek out primary sources, and be wary of secondary sources (even newspapers). Don’t read the science digest, read the science. If you can’t understand a primary source, this is a great learning opportunity. Study what you need to understand.

  5. Aim for an actively balanced life. Don’t find balance by standing static in the middle of everything—instead, hit the extremes and let them stabilize each other. (Some exceptions apply.)

  6. Have a gardening mindset. Learn new things relentlessly. Keep a beginner’s attitude. Every new person is an opportunity for resonance. This nurtures a system of support and interest arounds you.

  7. Have a borrowing mindset. Treat things with kindness and utility. Stay liquid and don’t buy until you’ve tried. Don’t get something until you’ll need it, and celebrate what you have.

  8. Take good care of your body and mind. They need to last your entire life. This also requires taking care of the space you inhabit—remember to clean and tidy, and be conscious of your media diet. Get enough sleep. Eat enough good food. This is not a place for extremes, contrary to above.

  9. Love manifests as appreciation and generosity, not possession. Enjoy what is in front of you, and give to it. A grip too strong can crush. On that note…

  10. Everything changes. It will end. It is beautiful regardless. (Consider the flower.)

  11. Invest in entropy. Work towards adaptability. A fairly minimal lifestyle assists in this. This also requires establishing systems that make decisions for you, and encourage you to live well. Use things to their resolution.

  12. Regularly reflect and reflect-through-action. Look at yourself, check yourself, then adjust. Encourage experimental living, as it nurtures acting on reflection. Use your life as n=1. (This requires travel, unplugging, and newness).

  13. The thoughts you have, actions you take, people you talk to, and culture you immerse yourself in make permanent marks on you and your identities. Your experiences and thoughts are objects of their own right. Make art to give the attention they deserve.

  14. You are a product of immeasurable privilege. Use your time, energy, and money to learn and act to the benefit of those without excess.

  15. Recognize the value in habits. More than explicit habits, consistency is key to making effects. Build patterns that work to your strengths and weaknesses. Block your time, remove distractions. Practice focus. Find the times that work best.

  16. You learn it by doing it. Synthesis comes through action; don’t sit and think too long. Gestures don’t need to be big. Small actions will lead to new insight, new questions, and momentum.

  17. Do stuff with your friends. That’s what you have them for. Ask for help! Go to things, or start them. Entertain questions. Generate energy. Make one-on-one time, and group time.

  18. It’s OK to take up space. Your desires can be reality if you pursue them. Don’t get too full of yourself, but you dictate the direction of your life.

  19. Find and focus on what you can give to the world, with your skills, rather than what you can consume from it.

  20. Explore problems quickly, rather than avoid them altogether.

  21. The cure for low self-esteem is to finish tasks. Thinking does not resolve confusion; action does. Knowledge is engaged when used. (But be aware when the right “action” is disengagement.)

  22. What would you do if you were not afraid? Had nothing to prove?